So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize