that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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