Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
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Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
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Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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