Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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