Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(514): View more from Quebec

..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop

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(301): View more from Maryland

You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain

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(720): View more from Colorado

New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?

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(408): View more from California

im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.

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27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(917): View more from New York City

u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.

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(904): View more from Florida

the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless

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(407): View more from Florida

Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart

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(613): View more from Ontario

Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too

(613): View more from Ontario

This was before halftime

(613): View more from Ontario

I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME

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