Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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