I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
