I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Green mimosas i think yes
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
