i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
