It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
