just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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