Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
