2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
