Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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