I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
