like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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