it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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