My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
