i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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