so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
