guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize