i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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