i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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