i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
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Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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