Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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