so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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