Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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