Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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