saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
