Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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