I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Randomize
