i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
