Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize