Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
