I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
then he tried to convert me to islam
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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