Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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