I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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