drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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