I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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