I'm jealous of your bromance
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
