when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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