omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
