When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I think people are normalizing furries
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize