Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
