Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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