sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize