All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
