For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
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Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
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The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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