Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
