Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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