Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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